Worried You’ll Lose Yourself in a Relationship?

It’s a gorgeous sunny day here in Venice and as much as I’d love to go to the beach, I am thoroughly exhausted!

Last week and the week before I caught myself acting in a way towards Loren that I didn’t like - it just wasn’t me.

I believe that anyone who really knows me would confidently say that I am pretty chill person. So, for me to scream at top of my lungs at someone, especially my man, is something out of the ordinary and a sign that I am out of alignment with myself. I was angry.

Since I’ve worked very hard at being in tune with myself over the past several years, it didn’t take much for me to realize that I need more alone time and for whatever reason I wasn’t expressing that to Loren.

As a single person I developed a consistent self-care routine which enabled me to be the person I desired to be in the world - to be a healing, loving, and empowering presence in the lives of people around me - especially my man.

However, without enough sleep, exercise, acupuncture, meditation, and etc. I find it extremely challenging to be the “Heather” I want to be.

2017 has been the busiest year of my life and it’s been a challenge juggling running my coaching business, being in school, and being a good partner to my beloved.

Thankfully, I have a very understanding and intuitive partner who is open to having fierce conversations. Once I realized what was happening and could clearly see my role in it (I had to take responsibility for not communicating this in a way that he could understand), I explained that I didn’t feel as though I was getting through to him on this issue of having more alone/self-care time. As a result I was starting to feel very drained of my energy and even suffocated.

We are working through this and I have no doubt that we’ll make it to the other side of this knowing each other a lot better.

Going through this experience with Loren made me tremendously grateful for all the personal development work I did before entering into this relationship.


I’m also incredibly fortunate to currently be in the middle of an amazing sex, love, and relationships coaching certification program through the Tantric Institute of Integrated Sexuality. The tools I’m learning here and sharing with my clients are also tools that I am using in my own life with profound results.

Every relationship has ups and downs. However, the first relationship you must learn to navigate effectively is the one with yourself.  

How well do you know yourself? What are your core values? What are your emotional triggers and blindspots? What are your non-negotiables? How do you define success for yourself? How do you know when you’ve veered too far from your “north star”? What will it take to get you back on track when life knocks you down? What is your self-care routine?

If you’re not experiencing the joy and happiness you absolutely deserve in sex, love, and relationships, the first step is taking a hard look at yourself.

To that end I warmly invite your to book a FREE Breakthrough Session with me here to get clarity on what’s blocking you from the luscious, lasting love you desire and the exact next steps you need to take in order to magnetize it to you.

Have a great week and I look forward to connecting soon!

All my love and gratitude,

Heather xoxo


P.S. Ready to manifest your soulmate? I can help. Book a FREE Breakthrough Session with me here.

Heather WilsonComment